As a coach, one of the questions I get asked the most is, “How do I find my purpose?”. Living in a world filled with endless expectations, societal pressures, and countless roles to fill, it can be a dauting task to figure out, what one is meant to be doing with their life. At some point many women find themselves asking: What is my purpose? Especially, when they’ve made all the “right” choices and still find themselves feeling a sense of unfulfillment. However, I have a bit of a spoiler alert – life isn’t about perfection, meeting societal standards, or having everything figured out. It’s about experience, learning, exploring, and aligning with what truly brings you joy, fulfillment, and meaning.
If you’re feeling lost or disconnected from your life’s mission, know that you’re not alone. I’ve worked with countless women who’ve felt this way, heck, at times I’ve felt this way. However, what I’ve learnt is that there isn’t a sole purpose we are meant to find, but how to connect with your inner self, and find the courage to pursue a life which is pleasing to you.
Take out your pen, because this blog is a guide on how to do that.
1. Let Go of Society’s Expectations
From a young age, women are often conditioned to meet certain expectations. Whether it’s the pressure to look a certain way, follow a particular career path, or fulfill traditional roles, society can impose a rigid set of standards on what it means to be a “successful” woman. Often these expectations are not to the benefit of women themselves, and serves the purpose of others.
This is why, living up to these expectations can leave you feeling unfulfilled and disconnected from your authentic self.
It doesn’t serve you.
Finding your purpose starts with letting go of who society tells you you should be and focusing on who you truly are. Remember, you don’t have to fit into a predefined mold to be worthy or successful.
Empowering Thought: You are not here to live up to others’ expectations. Your purpose is unique to you, and it doesn’t have to fit into anyone else’s box.
2. Tune into Your Passions
One of the most powerful ways to uncover your purpose is to pay attention to what lights you up. What are the activities, topics, or hobbies that make you feel energized and inspired? What are the moments in your life where you lost track of time because you’re so absorbed in what you’re doing?
Passion is often a gateway to purpose. It’s a signal from your inner self that points toward what truly matters to you. The challenge is to embrace those passions, even if they don’t align with what others expect or approve of.
Action Step: Take some time to reflect on what brings you joy. Make a list of activities or subjects that excite you. How can you incorporate more of these into your daily life?
3. Embrace the Power of Self-Discovery
Finding your purpose is a journey, not a destination. It requires deep introspection and a willingness to explore who you are beyond your external roles and responsibilities. For many women, this means peeling back layers of self-doubt, fear, and limiting beliefs that have been accumulated over the years.
Start by asking yourself the tough questions:
- What are my core values?
- What legacy do I want to leave behind?
- What impact do I want to have on the people around me?
These questions can help you tap into a deeper understanding of yourself and bring clarity to what you want out of life.
Empowering Thought: You have the answers within you. Trust yourself and the journey of self-discovery.
4. Focus on Your Strengths, Not Your Weaknesses
It’s easy to get caught up in self-criticism, especially in a world that often highlights what we lack rather than what we have. But your purpose doesn’t lie in fixing your perceived flaws; it lies in embracing your unique strengths and talents.
Take a moment to celebrate what makes you special. What are the skills and qualities that you bring to the table? How can you use them to contribute to the world in a meaningful way?
Action Step: Write down three strengths you are proud of. Think about how these strengths can be used to pursue a meaningful goal or passion in your life.
5. Find Purpose in the Small Things
Sometimes, the search for purpose can feel overwhelming, as though it needs to be a grand, life-changing mission. But purpose isn’t always about big gestures or significant achievements. Often, it’s found in the small, everyday moments that bring joy and fulfillment.
Purpose can be as simple as being kind to others, pursuing a hobby you love, or making a positive impact in your community. Don’t underestimate the power of small, meaningful actions. Over time, they can add up to a life filled with purpose.
Empowering Thought: Your purpose doesn’t have to be grand. It just has to be meaningful to you.
6. Release the Fear of Judgment
One of the biggest barriers women face when pursuing their purpose is the fear of judgment. What will people think if I change careers? What if I fail? What if I’m not good enough?
Fear of judgment can be paralyzing, but remember that your life is yours to live. The opinions of others should not dictate your path. The most fulfilling life is one where you’re true to yourself, regardless of what others may think.
Action Step: Challenge yourself to take one small step toward your passion, even if it scares you. It could be as simple as signing up for a class, sharing your creative work, or starting a new hobby.
7. Be Open to Evolution
Your purpose may change as you go through different stages of life. What fulfills you in your twenties may not be the same as what brings you joy in your forties or sixties. Be open to evolving and adapting your purpose as you grow and change.
The key is to stay connected to yourself, to listen to your inner voice, and to be willing to pivot when necessary. Life is a journey of continuous learning, and your purpose can evolve along with it.
Empowering Thought: It’s okay if your purpose changes over time. Growth is a natural part of the journey.
8. Surround Yourself with Supportive People
Finding your purpose can be challenging, especially if you’re surrounded by negativity or unsupportive influences. Seek out people who uplift you, encourage your dreams, and believe in your potential. The right support system can make all the difference in your journey toward living a purposeful life.
Consider joining groups, attending workshops, or connecting with like-minded women who are on their own journey of self-discovery. Community can be a powerful source of motivation and inspiration.
Action Step: Reach out to someone who inspires you and share your goals. Their support may provide the encouragement you need to take the next step.
Final Thoughts: Your Purpose is Yours to Define
Remember, finding your purpose is not about fitting into a mold or meeting someone else’s expectations. It’s about discovering what makes you feel alive, fulfilled, and connected to something greater than yourself. It’s about living authentically and courageously, no matter where your journey takes you.
You are powerful, resilient, and capable of creating the life you want. Don’t be afraid to explore, to fail, to pivot, and to grow. Your purpose is a reflection of your inner self, and it’s waiting for you to embrace it.
Empowering Thought: You have the power to define your purpose and create a life that is uniquely yours. Trust the journey and live with intention.
If you’re ready to take the next step in discovering your purpose, I can help you get there. Check out my services page to learn more, or website: www.deonambersley.com.
In the meantime, take the leap, embrace your journey, and know that you are enough just as you are. Your purpose is waiting for you—go out there and claim it.
